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Introduction
The Star Wars Holiday Special is basically a tragedy set to film. It defies all attempts at logic and all methods of explanation. Anyone who hears about it for the first time goes through the same series of mind-jarring reactions:
Stage 1 - Disbelief
"Ha ha ha. Yeah, that would be funny."
Stage 2 - Denial
"No. I still think you're joking. There's just no way."
Stage 3 - Understanding
"Well, let's see it, then!"
Stage 4 - Silent Fact-Gathering
You start searching online and find, to your horror, that this special is, indeed, real. Even after seeing pictures of Han with his arms wrapped around Wookiees it's still hard to believe.
Stage 5 - Horror
Upon actually seeing it, your faith in God (if it existed) is shattered. If you had no faith in God you may begin to search for it.
For people of my exact age it is even more confusing. I was exactly a year old when the special was on TV, so I am not old enough to remember seeing it when it first aired. However, I have vague memories of friends talking about it. A friend of a friend had it on tape. Someone else who was a few years older remembered seeing it. The Star Wars Holiday Special occupies a special slot in youthful urban legend alongside such items as the boy who ate the Pop Rocks and drank Jolt and exploded and bubblegum/jelly donuts staying in your intestines for seven years.
Some people think, mistakenly, that the Star Wars Holiday Special is hilariously entertaining in the it's-so-bad-it's-good category. These people are idiots. Idiots who have never sat through an entire viewing of the Holiday Special. True, parts of the special are great fun, however the vast majority of the special is completely unwatchable. It is mostly like watching a one-armed, blind, five-year-old bowl in slow motion for an hour and a half.
For the most part, the Holiday Special is barely tolerable. The only reason I have bothered killing myself with this special is because I feel the time has come for an appropriate review of this video torture device. The internet is littered with mentions of this special and with pretty good reviews, however, I felt that none of them took this special apart scene-by-scene the way it really needs to be analyzed.
So, with that, we move on to the complete review of the Star Wars Holiday Special.
On to the Star Wars Holiday Special Review
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