[Be The Reds!]

It's pretty common knowledge that the PM sucks. No one knows what is going on unless they watch it three or four times. After watching it more than that I began to like some of the less annoying parts. It certainly is possible to salvage the movie if you just edit a few places here and there. Here's what I would do (in order of importance)...

1. The obviously obvious thing to do is cut down Jar Jar Binks' screen time. All unnecessary scenes with Jar Jar, we can delete. "The Phantom Edit" already did that for us, from what I've heard.

2. Delete all scenes with Darth Sidious. While saavy Star Wars fans will still be suspicious of Palpatine because his name is Palpatine and because he's played by Ian McD, and because he's maneuvered himself to be chancelor of the senate... If we never actually SEE Darth Sidious, then in the end, we don't know if Palpatine is Sidious yet. Neither do we know if Darth Maul was the master or the apprentice. The Trade Federation guys talk enough among themselves when they aren't in front of Sidious' hologram that the audience can infer that it wasn't exactly their idea to blockade Naboo. This way, the "menace" really does seem "phantom"... especially to people who haven't seen the next trilogy. And "Phantom Enough" to the rest of us.

3. Edit the Darth Maul vs Obi-Wan Kenobi fight. Have Obi-Wan run through the open force field barrier, then immediately get knocked into the pit. (We can all laugh at Obi-Wan's inexperience, and Obi-Wan learns that reacting in anger and emotion isn't how to win battles... or something.) After he jumps out of the pit, quickly cut to the scenes that were originally right after he came through the forcefield. (So that there is a fight after he jumps out) Then after fighting for a while, cut back to him cutting Maul in half. This way, Darth Maul gets to go down fighting instead of looking like a big doofus.

4. In the opening crawl, change the "Trade Federation" to "The Nemoidians" or something. Nafta doesn't have an army. Neither does Asean, neither does the EU. It's unnecessary to have names like Trade Federation, Banking Clan, and Techno Union. Those are stupid. Call them by whatever their home-world is named. Otherwise we should be calling Tatooine the "Spice Cartel" or the "Gambling Faction" Also change every instance where the people say "Trade Federation" to whatever you said in the crawl.

5. Change the title. Phantom Menace is dumb. "Invisible Evil", "Hidden Darkness" or even "The Undetectable Bad Guy" sound better than Phantom Menace.

6. "Fear leads to hate, hate leads to anger, anger leads to suffering. I sense much fear in you." It appears that for two sentences Yoda's grammar has been fixed. Un fix it somehow, but don't make it sound dumb like "Around the survivors a perimiter create!"

There you have it... zzz

[andy_k_250]

It's pretty common knowledge that the PM sucks.  No one knows what is going on unless they watch it three or four times.  After watching it more than that I began to like some of the less annoying parts.  It certainly is possible to salvage the movie if you just edit a few places here and there.  Here's what I would do (in order of importance)...

1.  The obviously obvious thing to do is cut down Jar Jar Binks' screen time.  All unnecessary scenes with Jar Jar, we can delete.  "The Phantom Edit" already did that for us, from what I've heard.

2.  Delete all scenes with Darth Sidious.  While saavy Star Wars fans will still be suspicious of Palpatine because his name is Palpatine and because he's played by Ian McD, and because he's maneuvered himself to be chancelor of the senate...  If we never actually SEE Darth Sidious, then in the end, we don't know if Palpatine is Sidious yet.  Neither do we know if Darth Maul was the master or the apprentice.  The Trade Federation guys talk enough among themselves when they aren't in front of Sidious' hologram that the audience can infer that it wasn't exactly their idea to blockade Naboo.  This way, the "menace" really does seem "phantom"... especially to people who haven't seen the next trilogy.  And "Phantom Enough" to the rest of us.

3.  Edit the Darth Maul vs Obi-Wan Kenobi fight.  Have Obi-Wan run through the open force field barrier, then immediately get knocked into the pit. (We can all laugh at Obi-Wan's inexperience, and Obi-Wan learns that reacting in anger and emotion isn't how to win battles...  or something.)  After he jumps out of the pit, quickly cut to the scenes that were originally right after he came through the forcefield. (So that there is a fight after he jumps out) Then after fighting for a while, cut back to him cutting Maul in half.  This way, Darth Maul gets to go down fighting instead of looking like a big doofus.

4.  In the opening crawl, change the "Trade Federation" to "The Nemoidians" or something.  Nafta doesn't have an army.  Neither does Asean, neither does the EU.  It's unnecessary to have names like Trade Federation, Banking Clan, and Techno Union.  Those are stupid.  Call them by whatever their home-world is named.  Otherwise we should be calling Tatooine the "Spice Cartel" or the "Gambling Faction"  Also change every instance where the people say "Trade Federation" to whatever you said in the crawl.

5.  Change the title.  Phantom Menace is dumb.  "Invisible Evil", "Hidden Darkness" or even "The Undetectable Bad Guy" sound better than Phantom Menace.

6.  "Fear leads to hate, hate leads to anger, anger leads to suffering.  I sense much fear in you."  It appears that for two sentences Yoda's grammar has been fixed.  Un fix it somehow, but don't make it sound dumb like "Around the survivors a perimiter create!"

There you have it...  zzz

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Those are good suggestions. Have you seen The Phantom Edit? Combining that with your suggestions would make a better edit.

Thank God someone else hates "Around the survivors a perimeter create!"

[SithAvenger]

Thank God someone else hates "Around the survivors a perimeter create!"

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I also hated that line. :angry: