The Expedition Check the front page, NEW YAHTZEE SHORT STORY ASDFGASGFASF
#2
Posted 16 April 2009 - 03:04 PM
-The League Against Tedium
#7
Posted 17 April 2009 - 02:22 AM
'Twas an ok story but I sometimes felt it was a little bit dry, maybe more dialogues could have fit in there. Also, I didn't find the ending as shocking as it had perhaps been intended. The characterisation just wasn't strong enough for me to really care about the men's fate.
#9
Posted 17 April 2009 - 07:48 AM
Anyway, what the hell is the deal with these alien magicians? In Trilby's Notes, the beheaded corpse in the stairway room seemed humanoid enough and he was supposed to be an inhabitant of the Ethereal Realm. Maybe he and his girlfriend were guests there? That would be far-fetched and doesn't really explain his attire either.
#10
Posted 17 April 2009 - 08:33 AM
Judge and warden hide behind masks
#11
Posted 17 April 2009 - 11:05 AM
I like it. Not bad. Nice touch on the details, though. Lot's of vignettes, pretty Lovecraftian.
It reminded me of that comment he made on Clive Barker's Jericho (the one about his eyes popping out of his skull when he couldn't really figure the plot out).
I don't know why, but I could picture this very clearly in my head.
I wonder if Clive Barker's Undying is Vista compatible.
This post has been edited by Game Over: 17 April 2009 - 11:06 AM
#12
Posted 17 April 2009 - 01:08 PM
-The League Against Tedium
#13
Posted 17 April 2009 - 01:55 PM
Edit: Fuckfuckfuck can't even go for one single sentence without fumbling a typo in.
Edit: Oh for fuck's sake, not even when I edit stuff?
This post has been edited by Gobbler: 17 April 2009 - 01:59 PM
Quote
#14
Posted 17 April 2009 - 02:04 PM
The story was alright, though I think it'd be better not to be Chzo related...having the ethereal realm as somewhere moderately odd you can walk around in is a bit of a disappointment. I always cringe at mentions of the Ministry or STP as well.
As for writing like Lovecraft...he's using an old fashioned writing style, yes, but otherwise I don't think he was trying...probably a good thing, as most attempts fail badly. Dan Abnett sticking words like "non-Euclidean" and "cyclopean" and constantly unearthing ancient cabals/mosnters that have been manipulating the fate of the universe since before blah blah blah in his BL novels come to mind...though the latter became very common in BL and GW things a little before they gave up trying. Also, the Engineers seemed reminiscent of the Savage Morticians from BL's Dead Sky, Black Sun, by Graham McNeill, a bit before he gave up trying.
#15
Posted 18 April 2009 - 01:53 AM
http://www.springhol...zes/marysue.htm
Got 17, which means I'm in the safe zone.
Found here:
http://badwebcomics....y-sue-character
Nothing special really.