Darkness Review Question
#38
Posted 27 August 2007 - 04:08 PM
A quick not before I start: Hit me and I'll cry! Very well, I'll begin...
What you said was literally, exactly the same as what went through my head as I played the game (well, I wasn't thinking of Belgium... but certainly the cake!). I, however stuck at it for another 3 hours (I did go for lunch, food, toilet, drink, food, foof, halfway down the stairs, actually, I'm not hungry, etc.) and I did eventually figure out how to pass that stupid gate! I've only just remembered how I did it (although this may be a strange fantasy - who knows?), you're magical, retarded new arm can go through the fucking wall! You press the button through the wall and it opens! I took all the fun out of the next part by killing everyone incidentally with cars and liquorice and suff... no, that wouldn't be fun using weapons with that mongol! I got into the next building finally and spent yet more hours trying to figure out what to do while killing people with testicles and stuff as the little imp things are the most useless creatures ever. You point at the baddie and it sort of shrugs at you and buggers off back to hell. Anyway, my highlight was a full episode of Popeye the Sailor Man and a shit B movie from the '40s where the big alien monsters were rather timid iguanas! All watched on a shitty little security TV. Several hours later I finally figured out how to get into another freezer where Jackie pours petrol onto piles of cash and shoots it with a terribly proportioned gun and it magically catches fire, as if a bullet were a firelighter. I know bullets get hot but come on! The fire graphics suck ass and the demo finally finishes while my eyes bleed! It then tires to show me screenshots and convince me to buy the game some more. I haven't played my PS3 much since.
What you said was literally, exactly the same as what went through my head as I played the game (well, I wasn't thinking of Belgium... but certainly the cake!). I, however stuck at it for another 3 hours (I did go for lunch, food, toilet, drink, food, foof, halfway down the stairs, actually, I'm not hungry, etc.) and I did eventually figure out how to pass that stupid gate! I've only just remembered how I did it (although this may be a strange fantasy - who knows?), you're magical, retarded new arm can go through the fucking wall! You press the button through the wall and it opens! I took all the fun out of the next part by killing everyone incidentally with cars and liquorice and suff... no, that wouldn't be fun using weapons with that mongol! I got into the next building finally and spent yet more hours trying to figure out what to do while killing people with testicles and stuff as the little imp things are the most useless creatures ever. You point at the baddie and it sort of shrugs at you and buggers off back to hell. Anyway, my highlight was a full episode of Popeye the Sailor Man and a shit B movie from the '40s where the big alien monsters were rather timid iguanas! All watched on a shitty little security TV. Several hours later I finally figured out how to get into another freezer where Jackie pours petrol onto piles of cash and shoots it with a terribly proportioned gun and it magically catches fire, as if a bullet were a firelighter. I know bullets get hot but come on! The fire graphics suck ass and the demo finally finishes while my eyes bleed! It then tires to show me screenshots and convince me to buy the game some more. I haven't played my PS3 much since.
Tiredness can kill! Have a break, have a Kit-Kat.
#39
Posted 28 August 2007 - 09:25 AM
I'd like to say first of all that you need to fix your enter key. Paragraphs are not optional. Yes, I'm picky.
He keeps putting his testicles all over me.
Excuse me?
You know, like octopus? Testicles?
Ohhhh. Tentacles. N-T.
QUOTE (bobsickle @ Aug 27 2007, 04:08 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
...and spent yet more hours trying to figure out what to do while killing people with testicles and stuff...
He keeps putting his testicles all over me.
Excuse me?
You know, like octopus? Testicles?
Ohhhh. Tentacles. N-T.
My Let's Play of I Wanna Be The Guy! Do you have the balls?
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The Queen's own English, base knave, dost thou speak it?
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The Queen's own English, base knave, dost thou speak it?
#40
Posted 28 August 2007 - 11:52 AM
Now how did I make that spelling mistake...? I'll go and put in some more paragraphs etc. (I mean use the return key in random places in it). Now stop complaining! (please...?)
Hm. I can only edit this post... Sorry I can't make changes, mate.
Hm. I can only edit this post... Sorry I can't make changes, mate.
This post has been edited by bobsickle: 28 August 2007 - 11:55 AM
Tiredness can kill! Have a break, have a Kit-Kat.
#41
Posted 28 August 2007 - 04:44 PM
It was more like general advice than a complaint. Plus, the Better Off Dead reference amuses me.
This post has been edited by joshofalltrades: 28 August 2007 - 04:44 PM
My Let's Play of I Wanna Be The Guy! Do you have the balls?
--------------------------------------------
The Queen's own English, base knave, dost thou speak it?
--------------------------------------------
The Queen's own English, base knave, dost thou speak it?