[Chefelf]

Pinning this for discussion of the 64 Reasons to hate articles...

64 Reasons to Hate: Star Wars: Episode II: Attack of the Clones
(Actually 82 Reasons)

This article first ran on Lance & Eskimo in June 2002.

Post all comments here.

[Trigormike]

Actually, 1734 reasons

This post has been edited by Trigormike: 12 June 2005 - 07:57 PM

[Tpolg]

#11
Jedi food!

I still laugh a specific portion of my anatomy off when I read this one.

However, I must point out that fodder is an extremely loose translation of poodoo, and is actually only ever translated that way when referring to Banthas, which are ruminating and eat their own dung.
I seriously doubt Sebulba was saying “food!” after crashing his Podracer.
Come now, just take wild guess at what “poodoo” means.
The Dug’s curse on the Coruscant express way is still not a particularly good one, but then since most people who curse, curse poorly it is somewhat realistic.

[Tpolg]

#6

Following this Anakin states “I have not seen her for ten years”. Now in the commentary etc, Lucas feels the need to incessantly tell us that it has been exactly ten years (not twelve or thirteen) sense Episode I. So let me get this straight, the “fast friendship”, that was the reason for this particular assignment, is based on a brief cursory acquaintance from tem years ago? And when I say cursory I am being generous. She barely even speaks to Obi-Wan in Phantom Menace, and is hardly ever around him.
She has more of an on screen relationship with the members of the Jedi counsel in the Chancellors Meeting scene in AOTC then she dose with Obi-Wan in all of TPM.
Now I can hear Fanboy piping up right now, “Anakin only said he had not seen her for ten years”. But then the question is raised, what was Padawan Anakin doing while Master Obi-Wan was off fraternizing with a politician.
The line ridicules and unnecessary, much like this whole scene.

This post has been edited by Tpolg: 19 June 2005 - 08:29 AM

[Tpolg]

#15
You like it because; it’s really not that bad.
The lien is delivered with a reasonable degree of subtlety and somewhat appropriate to the situation.
I realize these are somewhat relative, but just compare to the death of Jango Fett. Does every one the bar stop what they are doing and stare blankly at Obi-Wan for five minutes?
You see Lucas, you can do it.

[The Lord of Dorkness]

  I will eat my hat if Nerf Herders are not mentioned in the next movie.

I didn't hear Nerf Herders being mentioned, so...

[Chefelf]

Damn.

Should we wait for the deleted scenes or should I just eat my hat now?

[Tpolg]

How about a poll?

[WalkingCarpet]

What is a nerf anyway?

[diligent_d]

Apparently they migrate in herds.

[floppydisk]

#1 result for "nerf" on Google img search:

[The Lord of Dorkness]

Well, according to the game Galactic Battlegrounds, nerfs are small, ugly, sheeplike creatures easily controlled. They taste good.

This post has been edited by The Lord of Dorkness: 29 June 2005 - 04:32 PM

[floppydisk]

I loved that game. Then I traded it back in.

[Cosmic Underwear]

Reason #35
The Shrinking Force
Mace and Yoda mention that their power in using the Force is diminishing. This is pretty weak. Why? They may explain it in Episode III but I hope Lucas had better use ALL that time thinking up an explanation because it's going to have to be a good one. He knows he's painted himself into a corner with the whole situation as far as no one detecting Palpatine's evil. Now he's buying a little time so he can try to figure out why. Between you and me I think he's got nothing.

Actually Lucas didn't paint himself in a corner and he doesn't have to explain it in Episode III because the answer is in Episode VI. The Emperor is losing his ability to sense Jedi because the Force is balanced by the time Han's team lands on Endor.

The Force was unbalanced before Palpatine became Chancellor and that's why
the Jedi were not able to sense Palpatine as an evil Sith Lord. If you think about it, the Force must of been unbalanced before Anakin was born, because he never would of needed to be created if the Force was balanced. You know it's the whole prophecy thing.

Vader referring to Luke in Return Of The Jedi:
"I have felt him my master."
"Strange that I have not."

This dialogue had no real meaning until 2002. Palpatine is clearly confused by his inability to sense Luke. The light side of the Force has clouded his vision.

[Cosmic Underwear]

Reason #34
Boba Fett
Boba Fett should not have been in this movie. What is Lucas thinking?!?! He feels this insane need to squash every bit character from the first three films into this film just because he can. The man who claims that he doesn't care if people don't like Jar Jar has given into a bunch of demands (less Jar Jar, more Boba Fett, No N'Sync) while completely forgetting that there is a story to be told. A story that has no room for an eight year old Boba Fett. He's the most wonderfully annoying character too, the way he's always smiling and giggling whenever his father does something evil. I felt the blood rush out of my face when he made his first appearance on the set. Boba Fett is such a nothing character! He had like three lines in Empire Strikes Back and even fewer in Return of the Jedi. Why everyone thinks he's so cool is beyond me but that's an entirely different matter all together. Everyone that could conceivably have been alive or existed at the time of the prequel trilogy is popping up and it's just plain dumb. I am dreading Episode III where we will do doubt see a baby Lando Calrissian and Senator Salacious P. Crumb.

The thing is I never put much thought in these movies when they came out because I just really didn't care too much. I have only recently been talking to other Star Wars fans on the net. I didn't really realize that so many people are so upset about these new Star Wars movies, and this isn't the first time I found a basher complaining about Boba Fett in Attack Of The Clones. See you only think that Lucas put Boba in the movie because of all the Fett fanboys out there. The truth is Boba is there for a couple reasons other than to please the Fett fanboys.

Boba is there to show that if you're raised by a murderous bounty hunter, that you'll grow up and be one too, because you weren't taught any different. But enough with the philosophical crap.

The next reason Boba is there is because, and I'll need you to open your mind for minute here, of what took place in The Empire Strikes Back. Notice in The Empire Strikes Back as soon as Boba starts tracking Han and Leia, then Luke has the vision of his friends suffer. Notice as soon as Yoda tells Obi-Wan to get Jango, then Anakin has the vision of his mother suffer. These characters aren't having visions because they're so powerful, they're having visions because something is guiding them to their destinies with these visions. See cloning people to be preprogrammed slaves is a crime and the Jedi should have known better and put a stop to the cloning but instead they really don't care and even become part of the crime. That's why Lucas put images of clone babies and children in the movie. You know, it's supposed to stir your emotions for what is right and wrong.

See Boba/Jango are there when Anakin has the vision that will lead the Chosen One to take his first steps into the dark and Boba/Jango are there when Luke has the vision that will lead the Chosen One to take his first steps back to the light.
Notice how Vader doesn't kill Admiral Piett, well that's because he's coming back to the light and of course when he kills the Sand People he's falling into the darkness.