[s20]

Heres a subject I would like to debate. Iv'e been reading about these parents going in to foster homes and taking their children back and skipping with them....It seems you here more and more about it. Do you think that maybe the state over stepps it self at times?

[SimeSublime]

Depends on the situation. I thought if a child was up for adoption, the parents lost all rights to it, as well as not know it's location.

[s20]

Iv'e been reading about it and I don't think they lost there rights yet.....the children were just in a foster home until everything was squared away in court .....but Iv'e heard of two cases about this recently. There was an amber alert just issued recently for one of them. They havn't found them yet.

[Slade]

The way I've seen it is that by giving a child up for adoption, you accept that you are giving your child away, losing all parental rights, etc. The child is only yours after that point in a biological way. Having the parents decide that they want their child back should be responded to with something like TS. They gave the child up for adoption, the child has gone to become part of another family. It's a little late to decide that you want the child if it's been adopted already.

What do you mean about the state overstepping itself? Not quite sure where you're going with that question.

[s20]

what I mean is the parents im hearing about doing this did not put their children up for adoption, the state went into there home and took them from what I read.....it said that there was reports of neglect.

As far as overstepping on the states part.......so far they have not been able to substantiate any of the reports or come forward with any whitnesses. With that being said, should the state of took the children in the first part with out proving first on the allegations?

So far, I have not seen any more updates on this so I don't know whats going on with it at this point.

[Slade]

Oh. That's awful. I thought there was some sort of process you went through where you were reviewed to see if the claims of neglect/abuse/whatever held up.

[J m HofMarN]

No... No there's a lot of other stuff. The state can decide who a child stays with after a divorce or simply decide that a parent is unfit for whatever reason. I'm not entirely sure of the process but I know it well enough and I won't elaborate there. The beurocracy will naturally make mistakes and ruin people's lives, that's the nature of such things. I don't know what it's like in other countries but I hope it's better.

[DBrennan3333]

This is an outrage, parents wanting to raise their own kids!!!

The government knows best, dammit, and I'll be damned if some Ritalin-averse, corporal-punishment-approving parent wants to have access to their offspring.

Hey, in The Government's Compound (a.k.a. Fairfax County, VA) 30% of boys are on Ritalin.

THAT'S the way things should be done!

[Slade]

There are two responses to your rantings, DB. And after careful deliberation, I chose this one. It's much less witty, but the other isn't very appealing for the mod of this forum to be saying.

On a third thought, I'll settle with this: you're definately over-reacting and misreading the information. You and Hannibal would get along well.

[Jordan]

It should be the childs decision. If the the child is too young to make the choice, then someone needs to step in and and take action. So the state should get involved.

There was a case like that up here in Canada. Some white folks decided to adopt a native girl, I think she lived with them for 2 years. She was about 3 when her 'real' parents piped up and demanded that they wanted her back. I say, to hell with them. They made a consious decision -give the baby up for adoption. To go back, after you rework your life or realize that you f'ed up, and try claim the child as your own is A) unfair to the new foster parents unfair and even more so, confusing for the kids.

Having a baby is a big thing. Giving up a baby is another big thing. These are not options you give 1 second of thought and then move on. They are big decisions and not to be taken lightly. I don't want my child, for whatever reason. Wait, give me my child back it's mine. I had it first!

This post has been edited by Jordan: 24 January 2005 - 12:45 PM

[s20]

It should be the childs decision. With all these children doing this new thing called divorcing the parents, it makes you wounder whats really going on and maybe we should start listening to the children and what they have to say.

[Slade]

Yeah, they deserve some say too, but I can't count how many times my parents pissed me off and made me wish I could divorce them, and in retrospect realize it was just either in my best interest, what they thought was my best interest, or general human foibles.

[Kirby]

The problem with these kinds of cases is that it is all looked at by a case by case basis, and some (Most if not all) judges are pretty subjective and biased tword certain parenting philosophies. Now im not saying we should have strict legal guidelines, case by case is the only way to solve such broad and often F***ed up cases. So there WILL be problems and sometimes grave injustices, but the system is truely trying to do their best. (even though they barely give a toss about most other things not involving celebrities)

Take my case for example, my mom is a very good, kind, and realy puts most human beings to shame when it comes to parenting. When I turned 10 years old my dad sperm-doner got tired of paying 50 dollars (not alot in child support standereds) a month in child support decieded he should have the kid he barely paided attention to and, often times, failed to pay child support to. Luckly the judge was the senseable kind who just took one look at the record and started to berate my dad sperm-doner for wasting the court's time. I was lucky, and was old enough to say "My dad can suck my chacolate salty balls" on the stand.

The kid in canadia is too young to say what I said up above, so it will probly have to go to court and see which parents she would be most safe/better-off in. Dunno if the same social sevices laws are even roughly the same as in the US but I feel that they have roughly the same pricapals.

[J m HofMarN]

DBrennan- Haha yeah parents love ritalin. It's so much better to make kids behave with drugs than with, ya know, parenting or something...

[Kirby]

I agree, I've always wondered about one thing though. When do they take the kids off the Ritalin. Do they ease off it like cigarrette smokers do or do they have to go to rehab like everybody else?