[Amber-Nicole]

Bloody baptists. Every year they do something around here called "The Judgement" at the fair grounds. It's supposedly a "life-changing experience." So many people know I'm not a Christian, so they molesterfy me with invites the week of the event every year. It's annoying. The thing is like a play, where something bad happens and then God sends them to hell, and it scares you into being a Christian. Last year, it was a plane crash.

[Chyld]

Sounds comically ridiculous. Bring me along next year, so I can pelt them with meat hammers from afar.

[Amber-Nicole]

Comical indeed. Last year when they got to the part where God was judging the people, they used flashing strobe lights. Because apparently strobe lights= scary and dramatic.

[Jane Sherwood]

I want to go! It sounds like it would be funny as hell, plus I could piss off a bunch of idiots in the process! That's always fun!

As far as the story goes, I don't think that girl was here more than a few weeks, she was either a freshman, or transferred in from another school. I remember the first time I saw her was in the band room, where she was - quite openly - reading a book about Wicca and its practices (I'm actually not sure if she really was one, per se, I didn't really think it mattered to be honest. And if she was/is, more power to her then).

BAD IDEA. I know from experience that if you read even a fantasy novel dealing with anything occult, that's years of fuel for their insults and taunting right there. And she was actually flashing it around and looking at people like it was a challenge. How could I tell? I used to do the exact same thing. I wanted to warn her, but I was afraid she might get offended or take it as some kind of masked threat. Unfortunately, by the time I was leaving, I saw that some of the resident psycho Christians and other ass-holes were already starting to get on her case about it. I don't think I saw much of her after that, but I heard from a friend that she had later changed schools, saying that a bunch of guys had either threatened her, or really had beaten the hell out her "for being a witch."

I'm sure that would have happened to me at some point too if it weren't for the fact that I scared the hell out of most of those people. Nothing like an evil glare and a two-year history of unpredictable mood swings to let them know "Don't fuck with me, you little bastard.”

[Jane Sherwood]

Heheh...

I just noticed that it looks like Jesus is wearing lipstick...

[Chyld]

I want to go! It sounds like it would be funny as hell, plus I could piss off a bunch of idiots in the process! That's always fun!

Right, 'tis a date then. I'll fly over to America next summer, we all meet up, and pelt these silly people with logical arguements and sharp implements. I'll provide some logic, and some objects. And some beer.

I don't think I saw much of her after that, but I heard from a friend that she had later changed schools, saying that a bunch of guys had either threatened her, or really had beaten the hell out her "for being a witch."

While I'm over there, methinx I'll have a crack at these close-minded twats as well. A good counter-attack is usually led by an idiot with a broken beer bottle in hand.

Nothing like an evil glare and a two-year history of unpredictable mood swings to let them know "Don't fuck with me, you little bastard.”

You can bring that to both gigs, and a knife. And some cookies, if you can.

In conclusion, God is alright, his followers almost certainly are not. One needs casual reverence, one needs their heads stoved in with a Maglite.

This took me three tries to post, at least. Bloody Hull University internet servers...

[SimeSublime]

Now to get together the money for a plane ticket. This may be tricky.

[Chyld]

We now call upon the mystic powers of "For some reason, my last student loan payment is £1000, to last two months, when I only have 50p to stay alive for the same amount of time right now..." I think that should create enough revenue to get me to America and back. With some spare money for extra meat hammers and beer too!

[Jane Sherwood]

Don't forget, I still need a ride down to Florida seeing as how I can't drive and all.

[Chyld]

Hitch-hiking? Flying? Growing wings? Bus? Flying elephant named Edgar? The world is your oyster...

[LsTr_Of_SmG]

Dont you get pearls in Oysters??? If so all those stories about the center of the earth being a big Hot ball of FLAME are all lies, LIES I TELL YOU!!! Its really a giant pearl worth enough to almost pay off all the student loans in the world!!!!

[Chyld]

Oh, for such a pearl. It's help, what with no money. Even the medical people don't want to pump me full of drugs for money...

[LsTr_Of_SmG]

Thats gotta be a first! Why dont you donate some sperm always good for money!! Not that I have ever done it..... Heh heh

[Brick McRunfast]

I used to donate blood, but then they started insisting that it had to be MY blood, and I'm afraid of needles. It's so much easier to bring in a trash bag full of the blood of the innocent.

[Jane Sherwood]

...I'm liking you more and more with every post.