Ten Ways to Kill Jar Jar
Hmm... Let's see:
1. Seppuku/Hari Kari (Japanese Ritual Suicide) For his betrayal in ATOC, that big toad thing (not Jabba, the other one) orders him to commit Seppuku. In Seppuku you stab yourself in the gut, slice left to right, which doesn't kill you. Only hurts a lot. Then an aide or enemy who respects you cuts your head off to finish the job. If they get the cut wrong, like, bad karma on them. If an aide: any Nubian qualifies, but why risk the stain on such a nice costume? If an enemy who respects him, well, no one respects him except George Lucas. Lucas makes cameos, but is Jar Jar's biggest fan. In other word, nobody qualifies. But Since Jar Jar is a comic genius, I have an idea. Jar jar can cut off his own head. Unfortunately, being a Looney Tunes character, if he did another one would immediately sprout up in place. Jar Jar is indeed immortal.
2. A refrigerator falls on him.
3. He's arrested for sending dirty email to an Imperial Page.
4. Someone forgets to feed him.
5. He's on Alderaan at the precise spot the Death Star beam hits. Bending over to pick something up.
6. He mistakes Polonium-210 for Salt.
7. He gets too big and Padme decides to flush him down the toilet.
8. He's looking at a light saber real close when he finds the on switch.
9. He walks in on a Black Panthers meeting.
10. Luke Skywalker mistakes him for a Womp Rat.
This post has been edited by Toru-chan: 27 January 2007 - 07:12 AM