Jesus, the Hippie - Chefelf.com Night Life

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Jesus, the Hippie "What If God Smoked Cannabis?"

#1 Spoon Poetic

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Posted 20 October 2005 - 01:40 AM

Jesus toked, man
I found this highly amusing. I'm not sure if this will incite any debating, but that's what I'm hoping for, hence putting it in the Debate Club.

This post has been edited by Spoon Poetic: 20 October 2005 - 01:54 AM

I am writing about Jm in my signature because apparently it's an effective method of ignoring him.

#2 Slade

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Posted 20 October 2005 - 02:09 AM

That actually explains quite a lot...

Given that Marijuana needs to be grown in a moist climate, and the Middle East is a desert, I don't really see it plausible except as it being shipped as a trade item from places that could cultivate it properly.

Mmm... Tetrahydrocannabinol miracles...

But if he's a hippy, did he also believe that music would unite the world under peace and love?

This space for rent. Inquire within.

#3 Jordan

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Posted 20 October 2005 - 02:10 AM

Jesus was pretty mean you know. I don't see why people think he was such a nice guy. I've read the NT, he got mad all the time, like All the time.

Oh SMEG. What the smeggity smegs has smeggins done? He smeggin killed me. - Lister of Smeg, space bum

#4 Patrick Bateman

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Posted 21 October 2005 - 06:37 AM

Of course Jesus was a toker. He wore sandals and had a beard. He never got a job, lived with his folks till he was thirty ... the list goes on.

#5 Zatoichi

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Posted 21 October 2005 - 10:08 AM

Um no, he was a carpenter. And people usually stuck around with their families even after they were married. As for getting mad all of the time Jordan, are you referring to the selling at the temple bit? I can't remember how it went exactly, but it was because the worshippers were doing things out of laziness.

This post has been edited by Zatoichi: 21 October 2005 - 10:08 AM

Apparently writing about JM here is his secret weakness. Muwahaha!!!! Now I have leverage over him and am another step closer towards my goal of world domination.

"And the Evil that was vanquished shall rise anew. Wrapped in the guise of man shall he walk amongst the innocent and Terror shall consume they that dwell upon the Earth. The skies will rain fire. The seas shall become as blood. The righteous shall fall before the wicked! And all creation shall tremble before the burning standards of Hell!" - Mephisto

Kurgan X showed me this web comic done with Legos. It pokes fun at all six Star Wars films and I found it to be extremely entertaining.
<a href="http://www.irregularwebcomic.net/cast/starwars.html" target="_blank">http://www.irregularwebcomic.net/cast/starwars.html</a>

#6 Patrick Bateman

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Posted 21 October 2005 - 03:06 PM

He wasn't a carpenter, he was a carpenter's apprentice. If I happen to work at Dad's hardware store it doesn't actually count as a career.
People DID NOT stay with their families after marriage.
Jesus got mad at those trading - primarily selling effects to be used as offerings to God - at the temple. "You have turned my father's house into a den of thieves."
He overturned the tables, pretty damn angry if you ask me.
I don't want to be rude but it appears you are a full on christian and yet have no familiarity with the book that lies at the heart of your religion. Is this on purpose or just because you are starting out?

#7 Zatoichi

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Posted 22 October 2005 - 12:15 AM

1. Ok, fine carpenter's apprentice. It was still his "job"
2. Are you sure? Maybe I should get my facts straight before I go and make statements like that. Maybe I was thinking that they didn't move very far away (or something like that. I'd look up info now, but I am too lazy).
3. That was one of the few times (that we know about). Wouldn't you be mad too, if you were in his place?
4. Full on christian, yep, went from Mormon to Catholic to Episcapalian. Just starting out, no. I've been a christian all of my life. The changes in sects were because of parents (But I like the church I go to now the best).
5. I have read various translations cover to cover, but I am not one of those extremely zealot types. Maybe it is time for a reread.

The book may be at the heart of my religion, but it is certainly not the heart of my faith.

edit, the google banner add reads HippieShop.com

This post has been edited by Zatoichi: 22 October 2005 - 12:17 AM

#8 Jordan

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Posted 22 October 2005 - 12:17 AM

He lost his temper with the apostles a few times. He yelled at pharisees and saducees.

Jesus was 30 when he started to preach. I doubt he was still an apprentice at the age of 20 since back then you were born into a profession, sort of~

Oh SMEG. What the smeggity smegs has smeggins done? He smeggin killed me. - Lister of Smeg, space bum

#9 Patrick Bateman

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Posted 22 October 2005 - 01:56 AM

Jesus was a toker, end of story. The visions, the miracles, all of it points to weed.

#10 Mirithorn

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Posted 22 October 2005 - 07:21 AM

Or schizophrenia.

"YOU'RE MISSING A PERIOD. YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY, DON'T YOU? YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY THAT YOU FUCK WITH GRAMMAR? WELL, FUCK YOU AND FUCK YOUR MISSING PERIOD! I HOPE IT MEANS YOUR SLUTTY, NON-PUNCTUATED WAYS HAVE GOTTEN YOU TEEN-PREGNANT!"

#11 Otal Nimrodi

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Posted 22 October 2005 - 09:29 AM

Or both

Want a Tarot reading?

PM me, we'll talk.

#12 Mirithorn

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Posted 22 October 2005 - 10:44 AM

But if it had to be imported, it would be expensive. And I'll bet Jesus couldn't afford much with a job as a carpenter's apprentice.

#13 Slade

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Posted 22 October 2005 - 11:53 AM

Visions and miracles don't go with weed. I'd wager it was a much stronger hallucinogen.

This space for rent. Inquire within.

#14 Mirithorn

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Posted 22 October 2005 - 12:36 PM

But where would he get a more chemically complicated drug?

.... It all leads to one answer....

The aliens did it!

#15 Despondent

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Posted 22 October 2005 - 02:12 PM

Zatoichi, I'm a convert too. Former Baptist Episcopalian here. Not a cradle, but I did have a "conversion" experience.

I don't believe Jesus smoked pot. I'm not certain he's against it. Wine can sometimes be a spiritual thing, but it's not necessary.
I'm certain if Jesus felt he needed to obtain a stronger drug, the solution would present itself. And the dealer might even replace Judas as apostle number twelve; if it was the will of God.